Really, really discouraged
I've had plateaus in my life. And this does NOT feel like a plateau. This feels like the end of the road.
I'm actually trading three to five pounds every week - gaining three, losing two, gaining four, losing five - never making headway from where I was a month ago.
Also, I can eat large quantities of food that I never dreamed I would be in a position to eat. I'm truly worried now for the first time that this will be all the weight I will lose.
That would not be time spent in vain. I've lost a lot of weight, but I'm not even to the halfway point of my goal. I'm much healthier than I was before the surgery, so it's not all bad.
I'm sincerely hoping that I can look back at this post and laugh soon. Adding to the discouragement, I unsubscribed to the yahoo! group for MGB patients. It's supposed to be a supportive group, and I just stuck out like a red-headed step child. My posts would largely go unanswered - and the one time I thought I was being helpful I ended up being called out by the group for "attacking" K.
I'm glad the forum is there for the people who know each other because it looks like it's a great, great thing. But for me, it was just compounding a problem when I am at my most discouraged.
By the way, I still have my kidney stone. The next step involves having an IVP, which is a date with the x-ray machine and dye contrast. I've had it done more times than I can count. After that, if they can see the kidney stone clearly with it, I might be a candidate to have the laser treatment to break it up.
Otherwise, it's back to the O.R.
Sorry to be such a downer today. It would be a lot easier to shield the blog from bad days, but I think it's important to share the good and the bad.
Don't be discouraged if you're thinking of having the surgery. Just be clear that it's only a tool and that you're going to have to do your own hard work to make it work completely.
I'll share more soon.
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